Elvis in Space
Now that we’ve looked at how spaceship decorating can go wrong let’s take a look at some people that have it all figured out. Let’s start with this guy. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Elvis in Space. Who knew that Elvis was a spaceman? I did kind of expect that it could be a possibility, but I didn’t know that Kool Keith was writing albums about it, or that you could download a game and save him from space aliens. I knew he wasn’t dead though because I saw him in Kentwood in the late 90’s. According to his hair stylist, the singer was in telepathic communication with aliens, so maybe his death was just a cover for alien abduction.
It probably gets pretty lonely when you’re supposed to be dead. And once you’ve been the King of Rock and Roll what do you do next? Easy. You build an homage to one of the greatest Americans to ever travel in space, Captain Kirk. Or maybe Elvis is just trying to get back to his home planet but lacks access to the required technology. Whatever he’s up to, you’ve got to admit that this is pretty impressive, this must have been a tremendous undertaking.
The Coolest Guy in the World
Check out this guy who had his home featured on Discovery Canada on Daily Planet. Talk about an entrance. He is easily one of the coolest guys on planet Earth. Take one look at him and it’s obvious he was born a space captain. If there were laser beams, explosions, and flying alien bodies behind that door nobody would be surprised. I am truly saddened to learn he’s still stuck on Earth because we could use him up here. It boggles my mind that Dos Equis didn’t hire this guy when they were looking for the Most Interesting Man in the World. Not only does he have a gigantic aura of genuine badassery but he also could teach MacGyver a thing or two. Most people would see an old vacuum cleaner in the trash and not think much about it. He looked in the trash and saw an old piece of human technology that was a door to another world. If I ever get back to Earth I’m going to look this guy up and buy him a beer. I’d be willing to bet that he’s got some fantastic karate tips.
NSA Space Command
Boring, drab office got you down? The excitement of stealing the world’s secrets not giving you the thrill it once did? Tired of having George Bush sit in a regular office chair? I’ve got good news. There is an answer to these problems. Use your immense power to blow a bunch of American tax dollars on redecorating your office to look more like a spaceship. Can you imagine how much more powerful you’ll seem while standing in this office and shouting “Welcome to the future, gentlemen”? Some of you will no doubt be outraged by this and for good reason. But you have to admit that this is better than those $7,622 coffee makers we heard about.