Decorate Your Spaceship
Sooner or later every space captain will need to make some difficult decisions about how they are going to decorate their interstellar babe lair. Spaceship decorating can be quite challenging because it’s not like you can drive a nail into the hull to hang a picture. Those of you who haven’t left your home for the joys of living in space yet have it a bit easier and we are going to focus on that today. Read on before you start to decorate your spaceship and we’ll hopefully get you headed in the right direction. There are many different paths available to the spaceship decorator and which one you choose will be based largely on the elasticity of your spouse or partner.
Let’s take this gentleman as an example. You have to give him credit for the amount of work that went into this spectacular creation. It could be argued that this was one of the great works of spaceship decorating. There are so many blinky lights that it’s hard to look right at it. Can you imagine the first meeting with the building inspector and electrician? Home improvements on that scale can cause you to fall into a martini black hole. The design work that goes into a project like this has got to be staggering.
You may want to decorate your spaceship but you have to remember you also have to live in it. Can you imagine explaining to your significant other, for the 50th time, that the power button for the coffee maker is labeled 13 on the third section of food preparation panel B? You are going to die. I would recommend juggling chainsaws as a safer hobby. And if you are a snorer you’re really playing close to the edge.
While we are at it. What does the power bill look like for this place? And who is in charge of changing the light bulbs and LEDs? I’m starting to twitch just thinking about it. Which button turns offs the lights when it’s time to sleep? It has got to be around here somewhere.
We talked about the elasticity of your significant other and sadly it appears that didn’t work out for him this time. He got the project completed and his wife was nice enough to let him live in it for a while……after the divorce. Life is short so live your dreams. Just make sure to plan ahead a little. A fair number of commentators on the next video would like to toss the hosts into the Sarlacc Pit. I provide it here only to remind you to take everything into consideration.
I hope he remembered to installed safeguards on the toilet to protect against the robotic parasites from the Zeta Quadrant. In future posts we’ll look at the mild and the wild to find what suits you best. Decorate your spaceship and celebrate victory with an adult beverage of your choosing.